Having friends with benefits is
increasingly common, and in 2007 60% of college students identified they that
they were in or at one point experienced a ‘Friends With Benefits’ (FWB) type
relationship. And of those 60%, 81% believed that it was possible to have a
successful FWB style relationship. However, 67% of the people who never
experienced a relationship felt that a successful FWB wasn’t possible.
In a recent Cosmo article, they issued the ’10
Rules of Being Friends With Benefits’. Many
of the rules aligned with Bisson and Levine’s 2007 Study. The first rule read
‘DO think twice about hooking up with your neighbor’ which aligned with the
study’s findings that 16% would never participate in a FWB due to moral
reasons, as the article addresses the awkwardness, and shame of seeing your
neighbor. Rule 3 ‘DO proceed with caution if you meet someone new’ aligns with
the study finding people found a FWB who was previously a friend is favorable
because you can have sex with a trusted partner. Rule 8 ‘DO protect yourself’
also aligns with the trusted partner issue. Rule 2 ‘DON’T convince yourself
it’s more serous then it really is’ also agrees with the ‘catching feelings,
fear found in the study.
However, some rules in the article
brings new ideas and focuses to Friends With Benefits. Rule 4 ‘DON’T encourage
friends and family to hang out with your FWB’ is a new focus on the dynamic of
this relationship. This is a topic that wasn’t touched or found by the study
but definitely an issue. The idea that you would want to keep your FWB somewhat
if not completely private to avoid judgment from people thinking you’re
sleeping around is a big factor in maintaining FWB. Rule 9 ‘DO be smart on
social media’ also addresses a new factor to FWBs. This retouches the idea that
your own moral convictions may allow you to have a FWB but many other people
and society aren’t exactly open to FWB’s.
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